False Prophet Ronald Weinland

False Prophet Ronald Weinland was in Georgia yesterday for yet another big announcement.  The last time he was to be there, Ron was a no-show claiming illness on that day of judgment on the 40th sabbath of the Great Tribulation, the Feast of Trumpets, and the end of the “time” before the real “times”.

As reported by Jack and Gavin, Rotten Ronnie has expanded his CV yet again, now claiming “I also am an Elijah-to-come”.  To hear it from his own lying lips, download the sermon from the PKG website and start listening beginning at 51 minutes into the file.  (If the link is broken, navigate to the audio page on the PKG website and download it.  Also if the sermon file link is broken, the file has probably been edited to remove announcements and/or other misstatements in which case the statement of interest would be a few minutes earlier).

To set the stage for his big announcement, Ronnie meandered through an article written by his spiritual idol, Herbert Armstrong in the March 6, 1981 Worldwide News  [8MB PDF download].  In this article, on page 10, 3rd paragraph of the 3rd column, Armstrong wrote:

I have been asked “Are you the Elijah?” And I say “No.”

That would be a reference to Malachi 4:5 “Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD:” However, in the WWN article following Herbie’s denial,  he seemed to claim the Elijah title without coming out and directly stating it, likening himself to John the Baptist.  This just prior to putting out another call for money to pay for quality for God’s end-time Apostle.  In any case, Weinland wrote in 2008 God’s Final Witness (page 162): “God’s end-time apostle and prophesied “Elijah to come” was Mr. Herbert W. Armstrong.”

At 1 hour, 8 minutes and 45 seconds in yesterday’s sermon recording, Ron squeezes in “I am the final fulfillment of the Elijah-to-come”.  So Ron is not only “an” Elijah-to-come, he is the final one.  I imagine he could easily proof-text for his followers that there can be more than one of “the” Elijah’s-to-come, should one of them think to ask about it.

Ron is certainly reducing his cycle time for adding titles.  He became a prophet in 1997 or 1998, according to various statements.  Yet he didn’t make an announcement of this to his church until 2002.  Then in 2005 he decided that he and the missus are the end-time witnesses and waited a couple of months before announcing it to his church.  Just five weeks ago he added the claim of being an Apostle after God “put it in his mind” just a few weeks earlier.  And now today he adds the title of the final Elijah-to-come.  There is an ever reducing cycle between adding titles. Since Ronnie can’t dazzle his members with brilliance, he’s baffling them with BS.

There were a few interesting asides before starting the sermon.  At one point he thought that Laura was giving him a warning look as though he was about to say something we wasn’t supposed to .  Is Ron a puppet dancing to Laura’s string pulls?  I doubt it, but expect that he needs her to keep him from chewing on his foot in any more often than he does.

His newest evangelist, Terry Wrozek, was brought down from Jackson, Michigan so that Ron could meet with him and senior evangelist Johnny Harrell.  On the agenda were discussions of the new yet unannounced doctrine, and things in addition to doctrine.  Ron needed to get his evangelists on board with the new changes before rolling them out over the next few weeks.  Could these “additional things” have anything to do with the IRS investigation? I doubt that Ronnie’s flight to the beast power is imminent, since even if the investigation were complete, there will still be a review process within the IRS and an additional review by the Department of Justice’s tax division before a referral would be made to a US attorney.  Nevertheless, he could be positioning himself should his legal position deteriorate.

It’s now 52 weeks since Ron cursed me with a speedy death for criticizing him, but somehow I expect I’ll still be around to find out what amazing new doctrines he promises to reveal to his followers.

A year ago this Monday, False Prophet Ronald Weinland started his job as Spokesman Witness for the second time and also restarted the Great Tribulation.  But he’s had to restart the Great Tribulation yet again and will do so again.

Four years ago tomorrow, Ronnie declared himself to be the Spokesman of the Two End-Time Witnesses.  And 15 years ago tomorrow, Joe Tkach Sr opened the First Seal in his December 17, 1994 sermon in Atlanta witnessed by Weinland’s backup man Johnny Harrell.

Joe Tkach reprised his Atlanta sermon a week later in his “Christmas Eve” sermon in Big Sandy.  Ambassador College alumni including relations of mine were in attendance for a reunion.

Here is a clip of the first part of Tkach’s “Christmas Eve” sermon.

Thanks to J of Shadows of WCG for finding this. He has links to both sides of the first audio tape of the sermon on his blog. (YouTube limits clips to 10 minutes each).

A video of the sermon was distributed to all the local congregations in the Worldwide Church of God in January of 1995. As a result of the changes introduced by this sermon, WCG imploded with Ronald Weinland leaving WCG as minister in March of 1995 and incorporating The United Church of God – Toledo, Inc. the following month.  And the rest — is history.

False Prophet Ronald Weinland spoke in Bloomington, Illinois today.  He drug along his elders Ralph Dowd and Ken Zitt from Cincinnati to say the prayers and help fill up the meeting room.  I wonder if he also brought along Chris and Audra as he did last week to Erie and if they again went out for hot wings after services, or if Bloomington even has such a place.

Ron is excited about awesome new revelations coming down the pike, to be delivered in about 3-4 weeks leading up to the end of the first half of his shortened time on February 6 for which a church-wide fast has been proclaimed.  Given that Ron’s new revelations involve numbers and novel interpretations of the Bible, he probably has two screens connected to his computer, with Excel on one screen to work out the number of days between different dates, and E-Sword with Strong’s Greek and Hebrew dictionaries on the other screen to select possible meanings of words which best suit him.

Ron again took a tour through history, talking about “duck and cover” drills school children were given in the ’50′s to prepare for “nukular” attacks. Stanley Rader was used in 1979 by God to defend WCG against California Attorney General Deukmejian, but no mention of the tithe and offering money that ended up in Stan’s pocket.   Ralph Dowd was ordained in September of 1986 when Ron was assigned in Cincinnati as associate pastor, Terry Wrozek was ordained as an elder in April of 1998 and Johnny Harrell during the Feast of Tabernacles held that year at Niagara Falls.

Ron repeated the mention of the trip to Europe in November 1999 and being hosted by Benjamin and Grace in their London apartment.  Also repeated his claim that 19 were in attendance in contradiction to his statement in December of 1999 that 12 were there including 3 children.  Maybe the 10 virgins were hiding in the next room making it a total of 19 adults.  Benjamin committed the unpardonable sin not only of being on Facebook but also trying to recruit other PKG members to be his Facebook “friends”.

Weinland also continued his tour through some old News Watch periodicals he published intermittently from 1998 through 2002.  Issues mentioned were:

• December, 1999 in which he prophesied that Y2K would be a non-Event, which was pretty safe at that point given the massive effort to update all the software.
• January, 2000 in which he rolled out the new name of the church in the banner and a new PO Box to which it seems his elders had not agreed.
• February-March, 2000 in which a 2nd new PO Box was obtained because of the split.
• Third Quarter of 2001 which was the start of a 4-parter proving that we’re in the end times.
• First Quarter of 2002, Ron still didn’t understand that 9/11 was the opening of the 6th seal when he wrote this.
• Third Quarter of 2002, This was the last issue of News Watch. Shortly after this, Ron opened the Swiss bank accounts. The following year he published his 4-color booklet “Time Has Run Out” and then went on to write his books.

Ron took News Watch off his website back in 2003, but threatens to put them back on.  However, you can download PDFs of these issues now using the links above.

Near the end of the sermon, Ron indicated that he is going to exercise his newly recognized office of Apostle by adding new doctrine.  A doctrine which he announced up front is not in the Bible, either — Old Testament or New Testament. PKG members will be expected to march in formation turning to the left or right as directed by Drill Instructor Ronald Weinland.   Being an Apostle, he is entitled to invent new doctrine just like the Apostles in the New Testament.  But then the Insane Liar invented his position as an Apostle in the first place, just as he invented his position as a Prophet of the God of Abraham.  He will no longer be bound by novel interpretations of scripture, he can just make it all up.  He expects that a few will leave the church.  I hope a lot of PKG members will leave, but I expect that most of his followers will continue chugging down the Flavor Aid to wash it all down.  Wonder if this will be better than his “no Facebook” doctrine.

Ron needs to use more smoke and mirrors to distract his followers from the lack of Great Tribulation.  December 14 (Monday) is one year from the first non-start of the Great Tribulation in the second timeline.  It’s now 12 weeks since the second non-start on the Feast of Trumpets.  Since I’ve made it now 51 weeks without suffering the speedy death Weinland cursed me with, I expect I’ll be around a few more weeks to hear what amazing new bull Ron has to share.  (I would have used a different word than “bull”, but listening to the false prophet is rubbing off on me )

At a couple of points during Insane Lying False Prophet Ronald Weinland’s sermon last Saturday, he took pot shots at some of the leaders of competing CoGs.  He dug up some old copies of his News Watch magazines from 1998 and 1999.  From the sermon:

[Reading from page 5 of the Jan '99 issue of News Watch]“The large organizations will no longer be functioning as they are today.  On the contrary, even now they are nearing their end.”

[Commenting extemporaneously] Now people can mock and make fun of that.  1999 – Hah, they’re nearing their end.  A lot truer today than it was then.  How near is near?  Ten years?  Eleven years?  Is that not near?  Amazing how human beings are sometimes, now haughty human beings are.  Some who like to poke fun at and make fun of some of what is said in one area of the thunders about certain leaders of the church.  It’s coming.  It’s coming.  In God’s time.  According to God’s will.

The “area of the thunders” Ron referred to is the first phase of the fifth thunder of the 6th seal.   During the first phase of the fifth thunder, Rod Meredith, Richard Ames (both of Living CoG), Gerald Flurry (Philadelphia CoG), David Pack (Restored Cog), and John Ritenbaugh (CGG) were to die early on.  This is all described on page 107-108 of 2008 – God’s Final Witness and offered as a test of himself as a prophet “How much more specific can one be to show that he is either of God, and indeed His prophet, or someone who has clearly stepped over the line to be dealt with by God in a speedy manner. Time will tell! And, you don’t have long to wait!”

As described in 2008 – God’s Final Witness “This phase of the Fifth Thunder is one of my own choosing, which God has granted me as part of His own will and purpose for the Church”.  Well, it’s over 3 years since the book was released in November of 2006, and over a year since the 6th seal ended for the second time, and we’re still waiting as none of these accursed CoG leaders are dead.  Not mocking or making fun of, just pointing out something for those who have eyes to see.  God didn’t grant Insane Lying False Prophet Ronald Weinland anything.

Ron wasn’t done.  He took additional pot shots at John Ritenbaugh for counting Pentecost a week differently a few years.  And then he went on to mention a “minister from Missouri”.

Ron started his globe trotting with a trip to Europe in November of 1999 using Steve Dalrymple’s air miles.   Ron mentioned that during that trip he used Benjamin and Grace’s home in greater London to conduct a Bible study which was attended by a number* of people including Phillip Burman who is still one of Ron’s elders.  The group in the UK now is fewer than 50, most of whom joined in 2007 and 2008 after Ron started promoting his book, so I doubt that very many of those attending Ron’s Bible study went with PKG.  Any friendships that Benjamin and Grace had with others in that small group are now ended by edict of Sheriff Ron.  * (According to Saturday’s sermon, 19 people were at the meeting in London in 1999.  According to the sermon of Dec 5, 1999 there were 12 people including 3 children.)

Ron continued on in last week’s sermon:

“It was at this time [1999] that we invited that minister from Missouri to be there during Thanksgiving while we were away.  And while we were away, the mice did play.  Because they started hatching up division while we were gone, while we were in Europe.  And they began to spread things around a bit here and there.  And they began to talk amongst themselves.  About what I was doing and I was their minister and I should be there and I shouldn’t be anyplace else and I shouldn’t go anyplace else, because he’s our minister.  And basically he should do what we tell him to do.  Little did he know what God was

While Ron was in Europe, he missed two sermons.  On November 20, 1999 Al Buchanan delivered a sermon titled “Children of the Light” to “the Church of God” in Toledo.  Al Buchanan was the minister of the Belleville CoG (a suburb of St. Louis in Illinois).  By all accounts, Al is not an empire builder.  In fact a few weeks after this last Feast of Tabernacles he stepped down, stating that he felt his little CoGlet was encouraging division within Armstrongism.  This just points up Ron’s paranoia.  Ron, just because you’re plotting doesn’t mean that everyone else is.

On the other hand, it was just over two months after Ron’s first European trip as a prophet that he seized control of the Church of God Inc from its lay board during January and February of 2000. Ron the cat swallowed the church whole and spit out the mice.

During Ron’s sermon this past week, he quoted from various issues of News Watch.  Here’s one potshot against CoGs that he didn’t quote.  From the June-July 1999 issue on page 3 (336kB PDF Download):

Today some believe they are to give a warning witness to Israel.  What a puny effort we see.  If and when God gives a witness to Israel, more than He already has, you will know it.  Israel has already received the height of a warning witness given through the Philadelphia period of time, and they rejected it.  That is a witness against them!

The next witness will be obvious. It will be when God needs no Church to help sponsor nor support it.  There will be such miraculous events accomplished at that time that much free publicity will be given. The work of that witness will consist of such newsworthy events that it will be widely reported in this world.  There will be no need for an organization to sponsor such efforts.

That future witness to Israel will be one that reminds them of the earlier witness they refused during the Philadelphia era.  It will tell them why they are then suffering once the physical tribulation has begun.  It will also be a message to the whole world of what is soon to follow – the Kingdom of God on earth with the soon coming of Jesus Christ as King of kings.  That job has been set aside for two to accomplish by the power of God.  No church organization is going to do it, and no individual is going to be able to set himself up as God’s apostle to do it. It is for the two who are yet to be sent by God.

Ron sure doesn’t skimp on his irony pills.  Ron, here you have it.  It’s all your fault that the Great Tribulation hasn’t started.  You don’t need the COG-PKG.  Turn it over to Johnny and strike out on your own exercising your awesome Witness powers.  When you and Laura are on your way out of town to call down plagues on world capitols, Y’ALL can stop off to breathe fire on that nasty IRS special agent who keeps serving Audra with summonses.

False Prophet Ronald Weinland returned to the scene of earlier crimes (perhaps a figure of speech) in Erie Pennsylvania where he lived for about 7 years ending in 1994.  Next week the Spokesman Witness will be in Bloomington Illinois at a location to be announced in an email he failed to send out yet.

Last week, Ron announced that Benjamin and Grace had quit the church.  Today he announced that they were disfellowshipped because Benjamin sent out emails giving his side of the story.  Later on in the sermon, he let on that Benjamin was defrocked in part because he was on Facebook in defiance of Ron’s edict that elders should not be on it.  This was rather ironic given that Ron read from an old Newswatch critical of controlling ministers.  It also seems that Benjamin had an issue with the 50th “truth”, although he was ordained after Ron rolled out this nonsense in June of 2008.

But God is just cleaning the body.  Just as he cleaned the body in one great sweep in February of 2000 in Toledo and Detroit. Ron will not hesitate to tell people who disagree with him to leave.  God is cleansing the church right now, Ron can see it starting again.  I hope the wave is a tidal wave of people recognizing the false prophet for what he is.   Note: the cartoon came from an ex-member of COG-PKG, one who has not commented here.

Ron promises to deliver a profound revelation about the thunders in a future sermon .  I have a profound revelation about the thunders right now:  they did not happen during the Sixth Seal the way Ron said they would in the chapter “The Seventh Thunders of the 6th Seal”.  Just as his spiritual breath of fire on me has not resulted in my speedy death 50 weeks after he issued the curse.

As a side note, Aggie who comments here has reopened his Purple Hymnal blog with a reintroductory post.  Back when I was required to attend the Church of Herb, the hymnal was gray which dates myself for those in the know.  Best wishes to Aggie on the renewed blog and I hope he still drops by my blog occasionally.