Archive for December 12th, 2009

Awesome Revelations

Saturday, December 12th, 2009

False Prophet Ronald Weinland spoke in Bloomington, Illinois today.  He drug along his elders Ralph Dowd and Ken Zitt from Cincinnati to say the prayers and help fill up the meeting room.  I wonder if he also brought along Chris and Audra as he did last week to Erie and if they again went out for hot wings after services, or if Bloomington even has such a place.

Ron is excited about awesome new revelations coming down the pike, to be delivered in about 3-4 weeks leading up to the end of the first half of his shortened time on February 6 for which a church-wide fast has been proclaimed.  Given that Ron’s new revelations involve numbers and novel interpretations of the Bible, he probably has two screens connected to his computer, with Excel on one screen to work out the number of days between different dates, and E-Sword with Strong’s Greek and Hebrew dictionaries on the other screen to select possible meanings of words which best suit him.

Ron again took a tour through history, talking about “duck and cover” drills school children were given in the ’50′s to prepare for “nukular” attacks. Stanley Rader was used in 1979 by God to defend WCG against California Attorney General Deukmejian, but no mention of the tithe and offering money that ended up in Stan’s pocket.   Ralph Dowd was ordained in September of 1986 when Ron was assigned in Cincinnati as associate pastor, Terry Wrozek was ordained as an elder in April of 1998 and Johnny Harrell during the Feast of Tabernacles held that year at Niagara Falls.

Ron repeated the mention of the trip to Europe in November 1999 and being hosted by Benjamin and Grace in their London apartment.  Also repeated his claim that 19 were in attendance in contradiction to his statement in December of 1999 that 12 were there including 3 children.  Maybe the 10 virgins were hiding in the next room making it a total of 19 adults.  Benjamin committed the unpardonable sin not only of being on Facebook but also trying to recruit other PKG members to be his Facebook “friends”.

Jan2000NWWeinland also continued his tour through some old News Watch periodicals he published intermittently from 1998 through 2002.  Issues mentioned were:

  • December, 1999 in which he prophesied that Y2K would be a non-Event, which was pretty safe at that point given the massive effort to update all the software.
  • January, 2000 in which he rolled out the new name of the church in the banner and a new PO Box to which it seems his elders had not agreed.
  • February-March, 2000 in which a 2nd new PO Box was obtained because of the split.
  • Third Quarter of 2001 which was the start of a 4-parter proving that we’re in the end times.
  • First Quarter of 2002, Ron still didn’t understand that 9/11 was the opening of the 6th seal when he wrote this.
  • Third Quarter of 2002, This was the last issue of News Watch. Shortly after this, Ron opened the Swiss bank accounts. The following year he published his 4-color booklet “Time Has Run Out” and then went on to write his books.

Ron took News Watch off his website back in 2003, but threatens to put them back on.  However, you can download PDFs of these issues now using the links above.

Near the end of the sermon, Ron indicated that he is going to exercise his newly recognized office of Apostle by adding new doctrine.  A doctrine which he announced up front is not in the Bible, either — Old Testament or New Testament. PKG members will be expected to march in formation turning to the left or right as directed by Drill Instructor Ronald Weinland.   Being an Apostle, he is entitled to invent new doctrine just like the Apostles in the New Testament.  But then the Insane Liar invented his position as an Apostle in the first place, just as he invented his position as a Prophet of the God of Abraham.  He will no longer be bound by novel interpretations of scripture, he can just make it all up.  He expects that a few will leave the church.  I hope a lot of PKG members will leave, but I expect that most of his followers will continue chugging down the Flavor Aid to wash it all down.  Wonder if this will be better than his “no Facebook” doctrine.

Ron needs to use more smoke and mirrors to distract his followers from the lack of Great Tribulation.  December 14 (Monday) is one year from the first non-start of the Great Tribulation in the second timeline.  It’s now 12 weeks since the second non-start on the Feast of Trumpets.  Since I’ve made it now 51 weeks without suffering the speedy death Weinland cursed me with, I expect I’ll be around a few more weeks to hear what amazing new bull Ron has to share.  (I would have used a different word than “bull”, but listening to the false prophet is rubbing off on me ;) )