Archive for November, 2009

They Followed

Sunday, November 8th, 2009

False Prophet Ronald Weinland was in Cincinnati this weekend, back from his trip to Sin City last weekend. Ron announced that planning is underway for sites at which PKG members will gather and observe the Feast of Tabernacles next year.  The 2010 feast is the third after the 2007 feast, which was to have been the very last one at which people would assemble before Christ’s return.  Not only is PKG planning a feast at “Time” plus 3 Months into the shortened Great Tribulation, but PKG members are also to gather for the full 8 days (or actually all 7 days plus the Last Great Day) instead of the shortened 4 day event.  As the time to the return of Christ on May 27, 2012 grows shorter, the length of Feast observance grows longer despite the onset of the Great Tribulation.

sheep_off_cliffA larger-than-normal group was in attendance in Cincinnati, including some from states as far away as Florida and Kansas and also from Ontario. The big attraction was that Wayne and Chris Matthews from Australia were there.  Ron had his three evangelists (Wrozek, Harrell, and Matthews) stand up for the benefit of those who did not recognize them.  Then he turned the service over to Evangelist Deputy Sheriff Wayne Matthews to deliver the sermon.

Wayne’s sermon and this post have the same title. Based on his earlier sermons, I expected some irony from Wayne and was not disappointed. He was in full cheerleader mode, and talked about sheep in Australia.  “Sheep don’t think a lot” and travel in herds.  One sheep will act as a leader, and all the other sheep will follow in single file.  Given these qualities, if the leader sheep goes over the edge of a cliff, the others may follow.  Wayne is like the sheep on the bottom left corner of the photo.  If you’d like to hear Wayne’s routine for yourself, download the latest sermon from the PKG website audio page and listen beginning at 1 hour and 6 minutes into the file.  (If you download the file after the announcements are edited out this coming weekend, the section of interest will probably begin at around 58 minutes into the file.)

After his description of sheep, Wayne advocated following Weinland, who somehow after ?God? puts it in the mind is proven to be a true prophet of God. Thinking is too difficult for the sheep, but Ron can handle it. Wayne warned against following the voice of a stranger, which these days usually appears on the Internet. “Don’t click on that.”  He may have been referring to me, since prospective member Roger changed his mind about joining PKG after reading my blog and considering the lack of prophetic fulfillment from Ron, despite a personal meeting with Deputy Sheriff Wayne. Unfortunately, Roger has decided to follow David Pack who while craftier than Ron is no better in the end.

Just in case you missed the comment by Aggie for another post, the Sixth Thunder sounded this week.  The article “10 Failed Predictions” on includes a mention of Weinland, but he just barely made the cut at #10.

God’s Church Ministry, Fall 2008

According to God’s Church minister Ronald Weinland, the end times are upon us– again. His 2006 book “2008: God’s Final Witness” states that hundreds of millions of people will die, and by the end of 2006, “there will be a maximum time of two years remaining before the world will be plunged into the worst time of all human history. By the fall of 2008, the United States will have collapsed as a world power, and no longer exist as an independent nation.” As the book notes, “Ronald Weinland places his reputation on the line as the end-time prophet of God.”

We are now 47 weeks into the original Great Tribulation, and 7 weeks into the shortened Great Tribulation.  And I await my fate from the curse for a quick death from the inside that Ron issued against me 46 weeks ago.

The Great and Final

Thursday, November 5th, 2009

Let’s flash forward to the final week full in May of 2012 which is also the final week of Ron Weinland’s overlapping 1260-day and 980-day timelines.  The US has met its demise as the result of the first 4 trumpets and was taken over 9 months earlier by the European beast power in the Fifth Trumpet during August of 2011.  The Asiatic hordes have arisen and their 200-million-man army was mobilized and equipped in less than 140 days beginning in January of 2012 and is maneuvering against the European Beast’s army in the valley of Megiddo in northern Israel.

Note: all quotes below are from 2008 — God’s Final Witness or Prophesied End Time (PET) with the [page number] in brackets:

[129] The last great battle of mankind (described in Revelation and prophetically known as Armageddon) is the account of these two superpowers converging upon one another and the battle that ensues. This confrontation is inevitable. This time coincides with the very end of the three and one-half years of final end-time tribulation.  …. China and her allies will move against the United States of Europe. These superpowers will pursue a head-on confrontation of military might, since both will be reluctant to use any more nuclear weapons because of the enormous destruction already experienced.

Ron and Laura at some point finally got their witness powers and called down plagues and turned water into blood, garnering them the media attention they craved.  Also, a number of Ron’s critics died quickly, including bloggers Mike, Jack, and another who owns a cat with a prickly personality (but his cat survived).  Prior to the demise of the United States including the evil satanic IRS criminal investigators who were waging spiritual warfare against them, Ron and Laura went(fled) to Germany. Jeremy and Patricia moved to the couch so the two witnesses could have the big bed.  Ron’s followers in the US were happy to see the Great Tribulation finally arrive because they were having trouble making payments on all the stuff they purchased on a delayed payment plan, but they were sorry to see their spiritual idol leave.

The Beast Power manages to finally arrest Ron and Laura from within their midst in mid-May of 2012, freeing up the big bed for Jeremy and Patricia.  The Two Witnesses are taken to Jerusalem and forced to repeatedly watch videos of Rick Miller’s ideaCity performance until they die at sunrise on Wednesday, May 23, 2012.  Their bodies are thrown out on the streets and the media devotes all their airtime to video of their bodies even as the largest assembled armies in human history clash at nearby Megiddo.

[130] The day the Seventh Trumpet is blown will be the third and final “woe” upon the earth. But three and one-half days prior to this, God’s two witnesses will be killed in the streets of Jerusalem. This event will lead to the first great event that will begin on that last day.

[22] These two prophets of God will complete the work that God has given them to do, then they will be killed in the streets of Jerusalem. Their bodies will remain in the streets of Jerusalem for three and one-half days while the world watches via television.

Three and one-half days later on the afternoon of May 26, the battle in the valley of Megiddo is about to be joined.  The Seventh Trumpet sounds at sundown on Saturday, May 26th.  Ron and Laura are resurrected and their bodies rise into the sky, tracked by the media cameras still focused on the story of Ron and Laura’s bodies despite the raging battle about to start only 50 miles north.  Ron and Laura arise along with the sealed PKG members converted to spirit beings and the rest of the 144,000 who are resurrected, they meet Jesus Christ who is making a UFO-like appearance in space.

[131] In the actual order of events for this last day, this will be the first event. The day will begin by the appearance, in the highest atmosphere of the earth, of a large area of dazzling light and a powerfully colorful display, which man has never witnessed before. It will be the physical appearance (manifestation) of the coming of Jesus Christ and the resurrection that will take place at this very time. All 144,000 people who have been trained throughout six millennia to be in God’s government (the first phase of the Kingdom of God) will be resurrected at the beginning of this day.
It will be at the time of the resurrection of these two witnesses (viewed by millions) that the 144,000 will be resurrected and given eternal life in spirit bodies.

[PET, 195] On the last day of the great tribulation, the 144,000 will be resurrected and return to earth with Christ.

The huge battle at Megiddo rages on even as the first six plagues of the Seventh Seal are thrown out on the earth.  As the blood runs deep in the valley, the battle is about to switch from conventional to “nukular”, but the armies finally take note of the six plagues and the UFO-like appearance of all the Elohims in the sky as the seventh plague is thrown down late in the afternoon of May 27, 2012. They cease fighting each other to face the new threat but it is too late.  Ron, Laura, Jesus Christ, and the 143,998 other Elohims land on the Mount of Olives and take over the world.

Let’s take a look at another couple of quotes from 2008 — God’s Final Witness:

[132, speaking of the Seventh Trumpet] In the first great event on the last day of the end-time tribulation, Jesus Christ will be in the heavens above the earth with the 144,000 who will be resurrected.

[9] These two witnesses of God, as recorded in the Book of Revelation, will do their work during the last three and one-half years of their lives, which is the same time period as the great and final tribulation that will come on the entire world.

I’m confused here.  Ron has made it clear that his job began at sundown in Jerusalem at the end of the sabbath of December 13, 2008. Since his witness gig lasts for exactly 1260 days, a number evenly divisible by 7, it ends at the end of the sabbath of May 26, 2012, which is the beginning of Pentecost, the resurrection of the 144,000, and the blowing of the Seventh Trumpet.  And these 1260 days coincide exactly with the Great (and final) Tribulation.  But then he says that the following day, May 27,  is the last day of end-time tribulation and furthermore  that it will be the greatest single day of destruction in all history.  So if the Great (and final) Tribulation ends on May 26, 2012, how can it be even worse on May 27?

‘Splain that, False Prophet Ronald Weinland.  Or do you need your Gap back?

The Logic of Wayne’s World

Wednesday, November 4th, 2009
Wayne Matthews

Wayne Matthews

On October 7, Evangelist/Deputy Sheriff Wayne Matthews gave the daily feast sermon in Rye, Victoria, Australia (near Melbourne).  (MP3 Download, right-click then save-as, or download Oct 7 sermon from this page) .  Wayne did not let on as to whether or not he’s found employment to replace that which he gave up early in 2008 to become one of Weinland’s hand-picked evangelists.  After all, back then it didn’t matter since no one would have jobs within a few months anyway.

Wayne talked about the tremendous growth of PKG in Australia since the 4 or 5 who were members several years ago.  He probably is referring to Peter Kay and his wife (since deceased) and Peter’s daughter Sharon and a couple of others.  I get the sense that there are several times that number in Australia now but probably not more than the 3 dozen or so members of this time last year.  Of the various provinces, there are only 4 members in Queensland (which is 5 times the size of Texas) which is fewer than last year, and still none from South Australia.

Beginning around 25 minutes into the sermon MP3 file, Wayne goes into a comedy routine.  First he proves that the Church of God – PKG is the true church because (1) it has “Church of God” in its name and (2) it has either an apostle or a prophet, well actually two prophets.  Flurry would qualify except that he rebelled against Joe Tkach — but somehow it was OK when Ron rebelled against Joe just a few years later.

He followed this “logic” by discussing the illogic of astrologers and soothsayers, and then described an episode of “Deal or No Deal” in which none of the astrologer/soothsayer contestants got it right, when some of them should have got it right just by chance.

Let’s compare that to Ron Weinland who has prophesied many things, of which only one has come true (sort of) — the economy.  Never mind that he’s prophesied the imminent collapse of the economy for years, and the economy while suffering has not collapsed.

Let me offer that my church is the true church.  The No Flavor Aid Church of God has “God” in its name, it’s led by a prophet (yours truly) whose prophecy actually came true, and who did not rebel against Joe Tkach.  This prophet has revealed new truth, which is that your living expenses (food, clothing, shelter, transportation, and medical) are not regarded as “increase” and are not subject to tithing.  But your disposable income is subject to tithing, so send it in. 🙂

Wayne is scheduled to deliver the weekly sermon this coming Saturday.  I wonder if he’ll deliver more gems such as this one or if he’ll deliver yet more “different thinking” as he did during the Days of Unleavened Bread.