False Prophet Ronald Weinland

False Prophet Ronald Weinland and False Prophetess Laura Weinland overcame the adversity of crashing airline computers and returned to Cincinnati to deliver his latest sermon.

According to Ron, his head was swimming last Saturday in Rye when he gave his letdown of a highly anticipated and oft-advertised Last Great Day sermon.  Ron, who graduated from Ambassador College with a minor in math, was confused by numbers and in turn gave a confusing sermon.  When I ran the numbers and determined a 280-day period of mercy and judgment which ended Trumpets of 2009 followed immediately by a  980-day period would end the day before Pentecost of 2012, and the combination would parallel his 1260-day second timeline, it was arrogantly pointed out to me that I didn’t have ears to hear.  Thus I had my nose rubbed in the Weinland Gap.

Ron posted a PDF file on his website.  The interesting part is shown below, with corrections by yours truly.

Weinland's Timeline Chart, Corrected

The tan timeline shows the original second timeline [talk about an oxymoron ].  The notation on it is confusing, implying that May 27, 2012 is part of the timeline which is not the case.  So I’ve marked it up in red, to show that the timeline ends with the day before Pentecost of 2012, on May 26.  Below that is the revision, with the 1260 days split into the first, throwaway 280-day time shown in orange and the new version of “time, times, and half-a-time” shown in yellow.  The orange timeline is properly notated, as the first day was Dec 14, 2008 and the last day was September 19, 2009.  The yellow timeline begins the following day, September 20.  And it ends on May  26, 2012, despite the confusing notation just like the tan timeline that it ends on May 27.  So I corrected it in red just as I did the tan timeline.

In summary, the 980-day period does not begin the 2nd day after Trumpets, but rather the day after Trumpets.  So the Weinland Gap between the 280-day period and the 980-days period has disappeared.  And Pentecost of 2012 is not part of the count.  But there still is a Weinland Gap — right between Ron’s ears.

I’m still confused.  If God revealed this new truth to Ron, then why did he get it wrong?  Or was God confused?  Is God a confused liar who fooled Ron with the first timeline and then gave him a confused revision to the second timeline?  Or does Ron not have ears to hear what God is telling him?  What else did he get wrong?

No, I think it’s like this.  To paraphrase a saying: “Figures lie, and insane lying false prophets figure.”  But they don’t always get their figures right the first time.

At the feasts of 2007 and 2008, Ron announced that there would not be a feast held the following year and that the members should take their second tithe and send it in.  This year he didn’t repeat that announcement and mandate.  In the sermon he clarified and told his members to hang on to it for now but he might demand it later. If Ron is not immobilized by either health or legal problems, there will be a PKG feast next year.

A few more questions for you, Ron:

• Ron, you said that Pentecost 2012 had to be included in the 980-day count to be significant.  Since it’s no longer included in the 980 days and therefore is no longer significant, will you be observing it?
• How are the earthquakes coming along, now that we’re 4 weeks into your shortened timeline for the Great Tribulation?
• How are you going to squeeze 42 months of beast power into 980 days less the 28 that have elapsed since Trumpets?
• Ron, you say you were apprehensive as the 280th day (Trumpets) approached.  Did you get even the slightest hint that God was annoyed with you by making you too ill to preach?
• And when will my quick death from the inside happen, as it’s now a revised 280-day-time + 3 weeks after you pronounced your death curse on me?

Over on Jack’s blog, a PKGer has been criticizing me for my last post in which I stated:

The revised “time, times, and half-a-time” (or 980 days = 3.5 x 280 days) did not begin until Trumpets of this year, and ends not at Pentecost of 2012, but rather the day before.

I admit to missing a statement by False Prophet Ron toward the end of an anti-climactic yawn of a confusing sermon.  No silent editing of my post without explanation the way Ron did his sermon back in June.  I was wrong on that point.

First a bit of a review.  The false prophet’s second timeline began at sundown in Jerusalem on the evening prior to Sunday, December 14, 2008.  This timeline lasts 1260 days or exactly 180 weeks and ends with Christ’s return at sundown in Jerusalem on the evening prior to Sunday, May 27, 2012 which is Pentecost.  In his Last Great Day sermon, Ron explained away the lack of great tribulation as being due to God’s mercy holding off the tribulation for the first 280 days or 40 weeks which ended on and included September 19, 2009, the Feast of Trumpets.  With appropriate credit for the 2-day fast at the end of January, but with no mention that Ron was too ill to speak on this day of judgment.  And this period was somehow a fulfillment of the 6th and 7th thunders.  Which are the revelation of Ron and Laura as the Witnesses and also their unitarian God, but which were to have been revealed to the world during the 6th seal.  And still haven’t been revealed in any significant way beyond the few thousand people who’ve heard of Ron and his false prophecies.

Then Ron  redefined a “time” as referred to in Daniel chapter 12 verse 7 as 280 days, so time, times, and half-a-time is now 980 days instead of 1260.  The 1260-day great tribulation less the first 280 days just happens to leave a 980-day or 140 week period still ending at the same time to be accounted for.

But as the anonymous PKGer pointed out, Ron said:

What does all of this mean?  It means that after Trumpets of this year the final time, times, and a-half are now being fulfilled.  And as I said as we go forward, God is going to give a whole lot more.   This is also important to understand that now the last day, the day of Pentecost is counted into the 980 days. To me that’s an awesome thing to understand.

And the justification:

And why would God do that?  Because in its very meaning and definition it has to be there.  It has to be a part of it. And yet in the other things we were given before it has to come up to the time of the resurrection, because it can’t include the other day.  Awesome, to understand that some things point to in timing a day where a great resurrection is going to take place at a very moment in time and it can’t count the other day that follows.  And yet another part of God’s plan reveals you have to have the other day in it to have meaning, to have purpose, to have a part of what’s pictured in it.

I’d like to thank the Anonymous PKGer for pointing this out.  I must have been confused by what he said just before this:

The 280 days is his sign, his appointed time. …  The point is that the book of Daniel, the period of time, times, and and a half did not begin until the following day of Trumpets. That’s when times … the oath from God began.   It’s incredible.  And you figure it up.

Note: later developments show that I wasn’t quite so wrong after all.

Rather confusing.  Did the 980 days begin on Trumpets?  Or the day after Trumpets?  Guess it had to have been two days after Trumpets so that the 980 days could include Pentecost.  So we have 280 days of not-so-Great Tribulation ending on the Feast of Trumpets.  Then we have a one-day gap on the Sunday following Trumpets, followed by a 980-day period.  Why the one-day gap.   Well, uh …  just because.  Because it has to be that way, so that Pentecost 2012 can be included in the 980 days so that it has meaning and purpose.  OK.  Pentecost needs to be given meaning and purpose.  Must not let Pentecost be without meaning and purpose.

Ron added a day when it was convenient.  He’s also taken days away, actually 3 and 1/2 of them.  Elsewhere in the sermon, he said:

… because of the 1290 days, which took us up to November 14, 2008.  The Seventh Seal was opened.  But connected to that same day, of the Seventh Seal, was 30 minutes of silence, 30 days.  That took us up to a prophetic fulfillment of 30 days.  Which was a final 1260 days when two witnesses began their job.  And that’s really all that’s revealed about 1260 days. That you can understand, that God gave, that will constitute a certain witness.  Because that witness has to be for exactly 1260 days.   Some people had asked in the very beginning “if they’re dead for 3 & 1/2 days they can’t witness“.  Why not?  What can be a more powerful witness of what God has said?  Than the last 3 & 1/2 days!!  That’s going to be the most powerful witness of all God was doing.  Not because of what we say.

No argument there, Ron.  Not from me.  You asked “Why Not”?  Well, no matter that you and both agree that your dead bodies would be a powerful witness — God says otherwise: the Two Witnesses are to perform their 1260-day job while living.  In Rev 11:7, it states:

And when they shall have finished their testimony, the beast that ascendeth out of the bottomless pit shall make war against them, and shall overcome them, and kill them.

Back from this digression.  The 980 day period is not a subdivision of Ron’s second timeline.  It’s actually a separate albeit overlapping timeline which is significant because, well, Ron says it is.  Yet another timeline, pieced together out out of thin air, just because.

Ron continued on with his justifications:

I don’t believe that things out there in the world by any stretch of the imagination are rapidly moving forward now, in way in what we might say “put on hold”.  They weren’t put on hold, they just weren’t allowed to take place yet. But to us it’s appeared as … we’re waiting.  And the most we’re seeing is an economy that seems to be, as the world wants it to be seen, picking up.  And yet we know that its day is coming as well.  And so all those things now are speeding forward.

And a little bit, just a little taste has been given to us already.  I have watched things on the USGS for years now.  Day by day by day.  I have never seen anything that’s taking place — and I have to believe that there are some scientists today who are deeply worried by what they see taking place — I have never seen anything taking place of the magnitude, that along the plates of the earth, that things are shifting the way they are,  and things are being shaken up the way they are, in swarms of quakes in regions of the world that’s like a rippling effect that continues on.  And that’s exactly what’s taking place right now.  And it’s an incredible thing to see.  Because it won’t be too long — it’s in the water right now.  And the worst it can do is a tsunami, and that hasn’t happened yet, it’s happened on a small scale but that’s nothing.  Woe be to mankind when some of those things begin to hit land in swarms.

How convenient. We’ve had a few earthquakes in the last few weeks, although nothing significant. And well past the due date for the Second Thunder which was to have increased during the Sixth Seal and didn’t. Which did not shake the earth to its foundations in April of 2008.   If we have a few more earthquakes, Ron will keep harping on them. And if we don’t have any, Ron will pretend he never mentioned them.  In the meantime we have another classic Weinlandism: “They weren’t put on hold, they just weren’t allowed to take place yet.”

Also convenient that “time, times, and a half” are now disconnected from the 1260 day period. As the Great Tribulation continues to delay he can redefine a “time” to be a shorter and shorter period. And on the morning of May 23, 2012 when he and Mrs. False Prophet are scheduled to deliver the most powerful part of their testimony by lying dead in the streets of Jerusalem for 3 & 1/2 days, a “time” will be reduced to a single day.  Oops, I did it again — Pentecost has to be included, so a time won’t be reduced to a single day until the Witlesses have been dead for a day.  No matter.  Ron will have switched to yet another timeline by then, we’ll just have to decide whether to call it his third or his fourth timeline.

Those few in attendance at the PKG feast site in Rye, VIC had a special meal after Johnny’s boring sermon in the morning.  After the meal, False Prophet Ronald Weinland started his highly anticipated and oft-advertised Last Great Day sermon by bemoaning how rapidly the last four days had elapsed.  Normally it would have been twice as long except for Ron’s cutting it in half.  There was also a  “Hi Mom” moment as Ron greeted his mother Ramona Weinland who is attending at the Lake of the Ozarks.

Ron has trimmed more than the length of time for feast attendance.  He has trimmed the length of a “time” from 360 days down to 280 days, which at 40 x 7 is a sign of God’s judgment and mercy .  The revised “time, times, and half-a-time” (or 980 days = 3.5 x 280 days) did not begin until the Monday following Trumpets of this year, and ends not at Pentecost of 2012, but rather the day before. {See my following post for an explanation of this edit}

Ron both raised and lowered expectations.  He mentioned that earthquake activity is increasing. But then Ron said that the European beast power might not arise until August of 2011, and China might not become prominent in his prophecy until 2012.  Deputy Wayne, have you found that job yet?

Ron is pulling out all his tricks to keep his second timeline alive and to hang onto his deluded followers and their tithe checks.

I prophesy yet another revelation from Ron on Feb 6, 2010, which is half-a-reduced-time from Trumpets of 2009.

One time that hasn’t shortened has been the length of my quick death, now 280 days plus another 13 since Ron pronounced his death curse on me.

In his latest feast sermon from Australia, False Prophet Ronald Weinland discussed his senior evangelist Johnny Harrell, how Johnny was a witness to history.  Johnny Harrell was actually in the audience on December 17, 1994 when “man of sin” and “son of perdition” Joe Tkach Sr. opened the first seal by upending Armstrongism in a sermon delivered in Atlanta.  This sermon was reprised a week later in the Christmas eve sermon delivered in Big Sandy and distributed in a video to other WCG congregations.  Johnny was in Toledo in February of 2000 when Ron took over the Church of God Inc from the lay church board.  Also according to a statement in this sermon, speaking of the Harrells:

“They went with us to Israel, they were there when we began our job.  And I feel very confident that they’re going to be there at the very to witness the end as well.”

In Weinland’s parlance “beginning their job” refers to the 1260 days during which they are to be the actual witnesses and prophesy.  The first time they “began their job” was on April 17, 2008.  But after the first timeline failed, the “beginning of their job” was rescheduled for December 14, 2008.

But in his sermon of December 13, 2008 delivered from Jerusalem just a few hours before the first trumpet reblew at sundown in Jerusalem, Ron stated that Johnny and Myrtle had left Brussels for Atlanta the prior Sunday while Ron and Laura flew to Cairo for a little sightseeing before continuing on to Jerusalem.  So what timeline is Ron on?  Did he really “begin his job” as a Witness on April 17, 2008 when Johnny and Myrtle were actually with him in Jerusalem, or was it on December 13 when they weren’t?  Ron, inquiring minds want to know.

Ron also broke his long prophecy drought.  He discussed the recent earthquakes in the South Pacific, and then continued:

“Things are getting shaken up out there.  Just a little bit of a beginning of some things that are starting to take place, right now. I thought I’d pass that along to you, because they’re not small things that are happening and are going to increase mightily as we go forward here in the next few weeks.”

I’m just curious as to how long “the next few weeks” are going to last.  Ron, will this be longer or shorter than my quick death from the inside that began with your curse on me issued on December 20th?

False Prophet Ronald Weinland gave the title of this post during his last sermon at the resort area of Rotorua in New Zealand before leaving to continue the feast at a resort in Victoria, Australia.  The title for his sermon was “God’s Purpose for the Millennium”.

The Millennium will be different but yet the same.  People will sin and even commit serious crimes.  No one, no matter how righteous, who dies during the Millennium will be immediately converted to spirit being to join the government of Ron, Laura, and the other 143,998 who were the first resurrection on the eve of Pentecost of 2012.  Some who die in the Millennium will be resurrected at the Great White Throne 100-year judgment, some as spirit beings and others physically to give it another try.

What will the Millennium be like?  Ron’s most important doctrine: Government.  No wars.  And justice.  Those who commit crimes will be put out of their misery rather than suffering in jail.  Education will not allow the maddened mindless idiocy of Darwinism.  The work of the church during the millennium will be to prepare for resurrection of billions for the 100-year Great White Throne judgment.

But bad things can still happen.  Fires, accidents. But no texting will be allowed.  But people will be allowed to commit adultery.  So the Millennium will not be a Utopia.

Somehow there was some new truth in this blather.  And this appears to be a warmup for the big new truth to be delivered on Saturday.  Ho hum.  We’ll see.

Tomorrow in the US PKG members will assemble in various hotels around the country to listen to Deputy Sheriff Wayne deliver his feast sermon.